JARGON MONOXIDE- The Corporate Cancer That’s Killing Your Business

 

There’s a silent killer in your company. It’s not competition, bad hires, or even a broken business model. It’s jargon monoxide—a steady stream of meaningless corporate gibberish that seeps into meetings, emails, and strategy decks, suffocating clear thinking and real action.

You’ve heard it before. The executive who insists “We need to leverage cross-functional synergies to enhance stakeholder engagement.” The consultant who claims “Our approach is to drive transformational outcomes via customer-centric innovations.”

TRANSLATION: Nobody knows what the hell they’re talking about.

Jargon monoxide is what happens when people prioritize sounding smart over being smart. It’s corporate carbon monoxide—odorless, invisible, and quietly poisoning your company’s ability to think clearly and execute fast.

HOW JARGON MONOXIDE SPREADS: 

It starts with one person trying to sound more competent than they are. Instead of saying “We need to sell more,” they say “We must drive topline revenue expansion by leveraging omnichannel opportunities.”

No one wants to be the idiot who asks, “Wait, what?” so they nod along. Before you know it, every meeting is filled with people saying things like, “We need to optimize synergies to unlock value through scalable innovation.”

It’s a linguistic arms race. The minute one person starts talking like a McKinsey PowerPoint, everyone else has to keep up or risk looking uninformed. The result? A workplace where people talk in loops, meetings take twice as long as they should, and nobody actually does anything.

THE FOUR FLAVOURS OF JARGON MONOXIDE: 

Jargon monoxide isn’t just one thing—it’s a disease with multiple strains, each more toxic than the last.

First, there’s convoluted crap. This is when a simple idea gets buried under unnecessary complexity. A restaurant owner could say, “We need to serve food faster.” Instead, they say, “We’re optimizing throughput via enhanced queue management solutions.” If your sentence could double as the instruction manual for a nuclear reactor, you’ve lost the plot.

Then, we have meaningless bxxxxxxt—sentences that sound impressive but say absolutely nothing. Think of a tech CEO proudly declaring, “We’re driving a paradigm shift in agile methodologies to disrupt legacy frameworks.” What does that even mean? Nothing. But people still nod as if they just heard the wisdom of Socrates.

Next is in-group lingo—words designed to make outsiders feel stupid. A finance executive might say, “We need to enhance our liquidity position through a more favorable capital structure optimization process.” Translation: “We need more cash.” If a smart person outside your industry wouldn’t understand what you’re saying, you’re not communicating—you’re gatekeeping.

Finally, there’s the jargon blender—when someone just throws together every buzzword they can think of and hopes no one notices. Ever read a company’s mission statement and seen something like, “Our mission is to empower scalable, AI-driven, next-gen solutions to revolutionize the digital ecosystem”? That’s not a strategy. That’s a Mad Libs page from a management consultant’s notebook.

WHY JARGON MONOXIDE IS KILLING YOUR COMPANY?:

This isn’t just annoying. It’s actively making your business worse.

First, it wastes time. If every meeting needs an extra 20 minutes to decode what people are actually saying, your company is moving at half speed.

It also leads to bad decisions. When ideas aren’t clearly explained, nobody can tell the good ones from the bad. If you pitch a project as “a disruptive, game-changing initiative leveraging best-in-class technology,” it sounds amazing. But what are you actually doing? Spending millions on an app nobody needs?

Jargon monoxide also destroys morale. Nobody wants to work at a company where leadership speaks in riddles. People don’t quit companies; they quit bosses who can’t communicate.

And it pushes customers away. If your marketing sounds like a legal contract, customers will go somewhere else. Nobody trusts a company that says, “We offer scalable, AI-powered, cloud-native solutions that revolutionize the digital ecosystem.” They trust the company that says, “We make software that helps you run your business faster.”

HOW TO KILL JARGON MONOXIDE?: 

The antidote? Call it out.

Next time someone in a meeting says, “We need to align cross-functional synergies,” stop them and ask, “What does that actually mean?” If they can’t explain it in simple terms, they probably don’t understand it themselves.

Set a rule: no buzzwords without definitions. If someone says, “We need to be more customer-centric,” ask them, “Okay, what does that look like in practice?”

Write like a human. If your emails read like a corporate memo from 1987, rewrite them. Cut the fat—if a sentence can be five words instead of fifteen, make it five.

And most importantly, reward clarity. The best leaders don’t tolerate empty words—they push their teams to think clearly, explain things simply, and focus on real outcomes.

FINAL THOUGHT: Simplicity is a Superpower

Great companies move fast, and fast companies communicate clearly. Jargon monoxide is a sign of a slow, bureaucratic culture—one that’s more interested in looking smart than being effective.

The best CEOs don’t hide behind complexity. They say what they mean, get to the point, and expect their teams to do the same.

So next time you hear someone say, “We need to unlock synergies through innovative, best-in-class solutions,” take a deep breath and reply:

“Or…LET'S SPEAK IN ENGLISH & get DOWN to work.”

does your HUMAN CAPITAL STRATEGY listen to the voice of the customer

 

YOUR 2025 RESOLUTIONS: sustaining momentum for the 365 days ahead

 

 

 

It's an exciting time of year. You're in the process of closing out 2024 while simultaneously gearing up for a successful 2025. If you're like me, you've already started to draft a list of New Year's resolutions and have tons of ideas on things you want to accomplish to make 2025 your best year yet.

By now you've no doubt heard the grim statistics on New Year's resolutions -- something like 90 percent of them fail -- so is the right conclusion to simply throw up your hands and assume 2025 will be pretty much like 2024? I don't want to crush your hopes, but statistically speaking, only 10 percent of us will actually achieve our wishes. 

SO… DO YOU NEED TO MAKE RESOLUTIONS?

 

You don’t have a choice!!!

 

Trying to maintain the status quo is terrible for your growth mindset . Imagine what's better: asking yourself to keep doing what you did last year? Or to perk up your spirit  by raising the performance bar  by a modest five or ten percent?

 

Over 50 years ago Prof David McClelland proved this point in a series of experiments known by the name of “RING TOSS EXERCISE” He found people  who actually  aspired for a modest goal  wallowing in deceptive self-congratulations; whilst those who chose grand targets failed and felt frustrated ….. BUT the one who chose “optimum” targets (a balance between “not to easy” nor difficult) were the REAL ACHIEVERS

 

Why? If the incremental change is modest enough, the brain seizes on that easy-to-bridge gap and concludes that the goal is easy. If you aren't aiming for improvement, your brain starts playing nasty tricks on you. The lesson in short, without any kind of new year resolution; you're more likely to get gloomy and create a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure if all you do is expect the same from yourself in the coming year.

 

 I add a tip… why not use the KAIZEN approach (steady but small improvement approach) for the next 365 day period. Work by ADDING only a 10% stretch target to make it “optimum”  lesson couldn't be simpler: no matter how challenging your circumstances or mediocre your team, give yourself  something to shoot for. In the absence of any goal at all, you are likely to backslide.

 

 

KEY TO SUSTAINABLE RESOLUTIONS IN 2025

However the reasons behind the good intentions not getting converted to results  are vast. But, I am willing to bet that they all boil down to one thing -- A LACK OF SUSTAINABLE MOTIVATION. Here is the proven pathway using very common motivators that can help you choose perseverance in the midst of complacency ; resilience in the face of adversity and focus in the midst of confusion: 

 

 

 CHANGE YOUR MINDSET- REPROGRAM YOUR SELF TALK

Sometimes the biggest obstacle to achieving our goals are ourselves. Don't think you're going to win that new business deal? Then you likely won't. “…He who believes he can and he who believes he cannot are both correct….”  said Henry Ford; the founder of Ford Motors over 80 years ago.  If you think your goals are achievable, you'll work harder to reach them. Negative talk is self-defeating. I'd argue that changing your mindset is one of the best habits to incorporate into a daily routine that will positively impact your bottom line.

Your self-talk (the thoughts you have about your feelings) can make or break your career. Prof Albert Ellis the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) said “… all self-talk is driven by important beliefs that you hold about yourself. It plays an understated but powerful role in success because it can both spur you forward to achieve your goals and hold you back. When you make a mistake, they either magnify the negativity or help you turn that misstep into something productive….”

Negative self-talk is unrealistic, unnecessary, and self-defeating. It sends you into a downward emotional spiral that is difficult to pull out of. When it comes to self-talk, we've discovered some common thoughts that hold people back more than any others. Be mindful of your tendencies to succumb to these thoughts, so that they don't derail your career;  here is a sampling of some self-defeating self-talk:

·         Perfection equals success and end up spending your time lamenting what you failed to accomplish, instead of enjoying what you were able to achieve. Far too many people succumb to the highly irrational idea that they are destined to succeed or fail.

·         My past equals my future. Repeated failures can erode your self-confidence and make it hard to believe you'll achieve a better outcome in the future.

·         My emotions equal my reality.  You should know how to take an objective look at your feelings and separate fact from fiction. Otherwise, your emotions will continue to skew your sense of reality, making you vulnerable to the negative self-talk that can hold you back from achieving your full potential.

 

 

 PERSONAL WORKSHOP:

QUESTIONS TO SHARPEN FOCUS ON WHAT REALLY MATTERS

 

Reflection and self-awareness can help set you up to achieve your goals in the NEW YEAR 2024 . If you're struggling to find your pathway , here are some  questions to get you started:

1.       WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY LIFE?

Do I have a Vision Mission and Values statement for my Life? (Now think deeply- What distracts me? What would I prefer less of in my life? )

2.       HOW DO I DEFINE SUCCESS?

(Is my life balanced between work and play? Who are the most important people in my life? What do I want more of in my life?)To set yourself up for success, make sure to identify goals that allow you to take interpersonal risks and think creatively. You feel most alive when you are learning, so you take opportunities to develop yourself.

3.       WHAT DO I WANT MY LIFE TO BE LIKE IN FIVE YEARS?

If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you there. But once you have your destination in mind, you can plan your route. Five years is the perfect timeframe: It’s not so far in the future that you can’t imagine yourself there, but it’s not so close that you can’t do anything about it.

4.       WHAT IS PREVENTING ME FROM BECOMING THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF IN 2024? What’s stopping me from doing the things that I should be doing? What’s the most important lesson I’ve learned so far in life?

Am I living that lesson? (What is one good habit that I have? What is one habit I want to change? What should I reduce doing or stop doing? (Now introspect what energizes me? What tires me? What relaxes me? What stresses me out?)

5.       WHAT ARE MY SOURCES OF HAPPINESS?

People who work happily work effectively. So ask yourself what do I enjoy, and what am I good at doing? What could I get better at doing? What do I enjoy doing but don't do well at all?... Then you know you effectiveness at work or home life will add to you happiness. It's having THE BALANCE between goals and the people/things that inspire us. Totally immersing yourself in your aspirations can lead to early fatigue and burnout. It's counterintuitive, but sometimes the best way to push forward is to take a break and enjoy the things in life that energize us. The idea is to do more things you enjoy next year, and fewer things you don't. You'll be happier, and you'll likely succeed in reaching those goals, since you'll be having fun working toward them.

 

 

6.       What is one thing I set out to CHANGE this year that I succeeded in doing? SO WHAT'S THE ONE THING I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH NEXT YEAR? You could begin by asking yourself “…If I achieved all of my goals, how would I feel? How committed am I to achieve the goal ?(on a scale of 1 to 100) And if I have to achieve this- what gratification must I sacrifice or delay?

 What can I do to feel that way as I work to achieve them? The ability to delay gratification in pursuit of your goals is one of the most fundamental prerequisites for success, but delaying gratification doesn’t have to mean being miserable until you cross that finish line. You can achieve more—and have more fun doing it—if you let yourself feel some of that pride and pleasure along the way.

7.       IF I WERE TO REWRITE THE WAY I LIVED IN 2023 … WHAT WOULD I WANT TO CHANGE or REPEAT?

 (Could I prevent the same happening again?) If you've had a hard time keeping your resolutions, then maybe it's time for a gut-check.  Most of us draft our business plans or write out our goals at the beginning of the year. It's a good time to reflect how the past year went and what we hope to achieve come the new year.

Start by answering each of these questions with the first answer that comes to mind. Since they are unique to the person answering them, there is no one right or wrong answer--it's your answer. At this point, you might start to see a pattern emerging.

SUMMING UP:

 

Sustain the motivation by seeking recognition- to reinforce the spirit. You are energized by public acknowledgment and by being praised and valued for the things you do.  For some of us, our most reliable sources of motivation are our families, friends, or hobbies. If this is the case, then a good strategy is to find an accountability partner or to tell others that you're working towards a specific goal. In my case, the fear of letting someone else down (other than myself) motivates me to push forward. 

 

Tapping into one of these motivators could be the key to helping you achieve something never before possible. Do you annual planning in writing and keep a daily journal of your progress. In my next newsletter I will write about how to keep a personal journal. Make sure that you set aside frequent opportunities through the coming year to work on developing your abilities. Make sure to voice your interest and map out a plan of attack to ensure you acquire the skills necessary for progression. 

With Best Wishes for 2025

Dr Wilfred Monteiro