It's an exciting time of year. You're in the process of
closing out 2024 while simultaneously gearing up for a successful 2025. If
you're like me, you've already started to draft a list of New Year's
resolutions and have tons of ideas on things you want to accomplish
to make 2025 your best year yet.
By now you've no doubt heard the grim statistics on New
Year's resolutions -- something like 90 percent of them
fail -- so is the right conclusion to simply throw up your hands and
assume 2025 will be pretty much like 2024? I don't want to crush your
hopes, but statistically speaking, only 10 percent of us will
actually achieve our wishes.
SO… DO YOU NEED
TO MAKE RESOLUTIONS?
You don’t have a choice!!!
Trying to maintain the status quo is terrible for your growth
mindset . Imagine what's better: asking yourself to keep doing what you
did last year? Or to perk up your spirit by raising the performance
bar by a modest five or ten percent?
Over 50 years ago Prof David McClelland proved this point in
a series of experiments known by the name of “RING TOSS EXERCISE” He found
people who actually aspired for a modest
goal wallowing in deceptive self-congratulations; whilst those who
chose grand targets failed and felt frustrated ….. BUT the one who chose
“optimum” targets (a balance between “not to easy” nor difficult) were the REAL
ACHIEVERS
Why? If the incremental change is modest enough, the brain
seizes on that easy-to-bridge gap and concludes that the goal is easy. If you
aren't aiming for improvement, your brain starts playing nasty tricks
on you. The lesson in short, without any kind of new year resolution; you're
more likely to get gloomy and create a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure if
all you do is expect the same from yourself in the coming year.
I add a tip… why not use the KAIZEN approach (steady
but small improvement approach) for the next 365 day period. Work by ADDING
only a 10% stretch target to make it “optimum” lesson couldn't be
simpler: no matter how challenging your circumstances or mediocre your
team, give yourself something to shoot for. In the absence of any
goal at all, you are likely to backslide.
KEY
TO SUSTAINABLE RESOLUTIONS IN 2025
However the reasons behind the good intentions not getting
converted to results are vast. But, I am willing to bet that they
all boil down to one thing -- A LACK OF SUSTAINABLE MOTIVATION. Here is
the proven pathway using very common motivators that can help you choose
perseverance in the midst of complacency ; resilience in the face of adversity
and focus in the midst of confusion:
CHANGE YOUR MINDSET- REPROGRAM YOUR SELF TALK
Sometimes the biggest obstacle to achieving our goals are
ourselves. Don't think you're going to win that new business deal? Then you
likely won't. “…He who believes he can and he who believes he cannot are
both correct….” said Henry Ford; the founder of Ford Motors over 80
years ago. If you think your goals are achievable, you'll
work harder to reach them. Negative talk is self-defeating. I'd argue that
changing your mindset is one of the best habits to incorporate into a daily
routine that will positively impact your bottom line.
Your self-talk (the thoughts you have about your feelings)
can make or break your career. Prof Albert Ellis the founder of Rational
Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) said “… all self-talk is driven by important
beliefs that you hold about yourself. It plays an understated but powerful role
in success because it can both spur you forward to achieve your goals and hold
you back. When you make a mistake, they either magnify the negativity or help
you turn that misstep into something productive….”
Negative self-talk is unrealistic, unnecessary, and
self-defeating. It sends you into a downward emotional spiral that is difficult
to pull out of. When it comes to self-talk, we've discovered some common
thoughts that hold people back more than any others. Be mindful of your
tendencies to succumb to these thoughts, so that they don't derail your
career; here is a sampling of some self-defeating self-talk:
· Perfection
equals success and end up spending your time lamenting what you failed
to accomplish, instead of enjoying what you were able to achieve. Far too
many people succumb to the highly irrational idea that they are destined to
succeed or fail.
· My
past equals my future. Repeated failures can erode your
self-confidence and make it hard to believe you'll achieve a better outcome in
the future.
· My
emotions equal my reality. You should know how to take an objective
look at your feelings and separate fact from fiction. Otherwise, your emotions
will continue to skew your sense of reality, making you vulnerable to the
negative self-talk that can hold you back from achieving your full potential.
PERSONAL WORKSHOP:
QUESTIONS
TO SHARPEN FOCUS ON WHAT REALLY MATTERS
Reflection and self-awareness can help set you up to achieve
your goals in the NEW YEAR 2024 . If you're struggling to find your pathway ,
here are some questions to get you started:
1. WHAT
IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY LIFE?
Do I have a Vision Mission and Values statement for my Life?
(Now think deeply- What distracts me? What would I prefer less of in my life? )
2. HOW
DO I DEFINE SUCCESS?
(Is my life balanced between work and play? Who are the most
important people in my life? What do I want more of in my life?)To set yourself
up for success, make sure to identify goals that allow you to take
interpersonal risks and think creatively. You feel most alive when you are
learning, so you take opportunities to develop yourself.
3. WHAT
DO I WANT MY LIFE TO BE LIKE IN FIVE YEARS?
If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you
there. But once you have your destination in mind, you can plan your route.
Five years is the perfect timeframe: It’s not so far in the future that you
can’t imagine yourself there, but it’s not so close that you can’t do anything
about it.
4. WHAT IS
PREVENTING ME FROM BECOMING THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF IN 2024? What’s
stopping me from doing the things that I should be doing? What’s the most
important lesson I’ve learned so far in life?
Am I living that lesson? (What is one good habit that I
have? What is one habit I want to change? What should I reduce doing or stop
doing? (Now introspect what energizes me? What tires me? What relaxes me? What
stresses me out?)
5. WHAT
ARE MY SOURCES OF HAPPINESS?
People who work happily work effectively. So ask yourself
what do I enjoy, and what am I good at doing? What could I get better at doing?
What do I enjoy doing but don't do well at all?... Then you know you
effectiveness at work or home life will add to you happiness. It's having
THE BALANCE between goals and the people/things that inspire us. Totally
immersing yourself in your aspirations can lead to early fatigue and burnout.
It's counterintuitive, but sometimes the best way to push forward is to take a
break and enjoy the things in life that energize us. The idea is to do
more things you enjoy next year, and fewer things you don't. You'll be
happier, and you'll likely succeed in reaching those goals, since you'll be
having fun working toward them.
6. What is one
thing I set out to CHANGE this year that I succeeded in doing? SO WHAT'S THE
ONE THING I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH NEXT YEAR? You could begin by asking
yourself “…If I achieved all of my goals, how would I feel? How committed
am I to achieve the goal ?(on a scale of 1 to 100) And if I have to achieve
this- what gratification must I sacrifice or delay?
What can I do to feel that way as I work to achieve
them? The ability to delay gratification in pursuit of your goals is one
of the most fundamental prerequisites for success, but delaying gratification
doesn’t have to mean being miserable until you cross that finish line. You can
achieve more—and have more fun doing it—if you let yourself feel some of that
pride and pleasure along the way.
7. IF I WERE TO
REWRITE THE WAY I LIVED IN 2023 … WHAT WOULD I WANT TO CHANGE or REPEAT?
(Could I prevent the same happening again?) If
you've had a hard time keeping your resolutions, then maybe it's time for a
gut-check. Most of us draft our business plans or write out our
goals at the beginning of the year. It's a good time to reflect how the past
year went and what we hope to achieve come the new year.
Start by answering each of these questions with the first
answer that comes to mind. Since they are unique to the person answering them,
there is no one right or wrong answer--it's your answer. At this point, you
might start to see a pattern emerging.
SUMMING
UP:
Sustain the motivation by seeking recognition- to reinforce
the spirit. You are energized by public acknowledgment and by being
praised and valued for the things you do. For some of us, our
most reliable sources of motivation are our families, friends, or
hobbies. If this is the case, then a good strategy is to find an
accountability partner or to tell others that you're working towards a specific
goal. In my case, the fear of letting someone else down (other than myself)
motivates me to push forward.
Tapping into one of these motivators could be the key to
helping you achieve something never before possible. Do you annual planning in
writing and keep a daily journal of your progress. In my next newsletter I will
write about how to keep a personal journal. Make sure that you set aside
frequent opportunities through the coming year to work on developing your
abilities. Make sure to voice your interest and map out a plan of attack to
ensure you acquire the skills necessary for progression.
With Best Wishes for 2025
Dr Wilfred Monteiro
